This
week I am proud to include a Character Interview of Iffy
Magic’s very own Zenaides by Sadie St. Elle-Maid of the Faerie Era, the premier
news folio in the Faerie Vale.
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Art by Audrey Bagley |
*Please note that this portrait is several hundred years out of date.
No current image of Zenaides is available.
St. Elle-Maid: It’s not
often that I have the distinct dishonor of interviewing a pernicious pixie. How do you take your tea, one lump or two?
Zenaides: No sugar,
thank you. A pinch of dried hemlock will do nicely. And 'pernicious pixie’ is a
rather droll term, don’t you think? “Wicked fairy” suits me just fine.
St. Elle-Maid: As a thoroughly vile wicked fairy, how many mortals have you
hexed? And what is your favorite method of hexing; toad, frog or newt?
Zenaides: Not to brag—that’s
a hexable vice, after all—but I must admit that I lost count after the first
hundred or so. Over the centuries, I’ve found myself growing weary of the
common amphibious spell. I’ve recently started experimenting with fowl play in a
group hexing; “duck, duck goose” is my current favorite.
St. Elle-Maid:
Fascinating. And when did you first realize your destiny as a
nefarious foe of good fairy godmothers everywhere?
Zenaides: Oh, some ages
ago . . . I think there was a princess. Mine, actually! But she had the heart
of a viper and I had the temper of a dragon, and, well—enough about dull little old me. I only agreed to this interview because I wished to meet the
foolish nitwing who cast slanderous aspersions on Primrose Goodwing.
St. Elle-Maid: Aspersions?
I never—
Zenaides: I believe you
accused "Little Miss Pixie Perfect" of employing forbidden dark magic to create the notorious glass
slippers.
St. Elle-Maid: I was
only repeating my sources. My readership deserve the absolute, unvarnished
truth—
Zenaides: Malicious gossip
you fanned to a bonfire! You should be ashamed of your shoddy exposé. I count Miss
Goodwing as my particular acquaintance and can state with unequivocal candor that she is an upstanding pixie who could go far as a wicked fairy. Very
far.
St. Elle-Maid: Oh really?
Do tell us her wretched secret!
Zenaides: There’s
nothing secret about it. I knew from the moment that we crossed wands that Primrose
has a rebel spark in her. She won’t let nonsensical notions of the proper way
to be a fairy godmother get in the way of—
St. Elle-Maid: Wait,
you two dueled? Who won?
Zenaides: I know I said
that I rarely indulge in the classical hexes anymore, but I do believe a toad
hex will suit you well. The warts do wonders.
St. Elle-Maid: Don’t be
coy now. You’re clearly avoiding my question.
Zenaides: Am I, poppet?
Why not try out my hex for a day and then
guess who won.
St. Elle-Maid: I’ve
been a toad twice this month already; a unique hazard of my profession, I’m
afraid. Might I try something a little more exotic this time, perhaps an
“aardvark”?
Zenaides: Intriguing! As
you wish.
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